Living on a Prayer..

Well, actually I’m waiting on a prayer, but since I’m gearing up for the Bon Jovi concert next week with girlfriends from high school (i will post pics with the big hair), the music has been on the brain.

Really I’m waiting for a prayer to be answered.  This past Monday I interviewed for a job that I really, really, really want.  It’s nothing like I’ve ever been involved in from a work standpoint. It has the awesome potential to use my business skills in a ministry operation that will allow me to go on a mission trip annually.  It sounds too good to be true.  But they said they would be making a decision on Monday afternoon and it’s Friday and I haven’t heard anything.  I even sent a follow up thank you.  Nothing, nada, zilch! Uggg!

The house offer has been in negotiations for almost 2 weeks.  It’s an adorable 1940’s cottage near downtown Franklin, not far from 5 Points.  And it’s really close to the offices of the new job!  Fenced in backyard for safe play, really nice neighbors, 3 beds, 2 baths in the Frankling Special School District.  It’s perfect.  It’s been rehabbed enough to make it cute, but still has a ton of potential to take it to the next level.  I love rehab! Check out my pics! This is what I did with my rental house last Oct. This is what it looked like before. (For future reference, plaster walls with a window in the shower, not a good combination) It was so much fun!

So, back to the purpose of the post – prayer!  Some of the changes I’ve been making in my life have involved learning to let God lead me in His direction instead of mine is not an easy task for me.  I’ve been pretty self centered in my life when it comes to my way or His way.  My way has won thus far and it has proven to be wrong for the most part. 

So what changes does one have to make to let God led.  There are several that I’ve come up with for me.  Let’s call them the 3 P’s – Purpose, Prayer, Patience.  Read on…

  1. Purpose.  It is why I keep Jeramiah 29:11 on my blog.  It is to remind myself that God has a purpose for my life.  I am not defined by being a wife or a mother.  Those are wonderful things, but I am more than Jacob & Emma’s Mommy. I am uniquely made to dream big and excel when I do my best to fullfill God’s purpose for my life.  Jer. 29:11 reminds me that He intentionally provides for me.  It is not a crap shoot. It is with divine intent.  Here’s another verse that I love, Phillipians 4:9 MSG – God, who makes everything work together, will work you into his most excellent harmonies. There are a ton of verses just like this found in Max Lucado’s book YOU! God’s Brand-New Idea, Made to be Amazing. (could you tell I was reading a Lucado book?)
  2. Prayer. I’ve had to change the way I pray significantly.  During my early 20’s I usually prayed with my head in the toliet or laying on the cold bathroom floor. I’m not joking here. Most often I prayed when I was sick or drunk. My prayer was: If you just get me through this…. I’ll…. This is survival prayer. During my early 30’s my prayers turned to things I wanted, like a family. My prayer was: If I can have this…  I’ll…  It really wasn’t prayer, it was a negotiating session.  Learning to let God lead requires one to go with His will not yours right. So my prayer this week has been: God please allow me to have this experience if this is where I am supposed to be and where You can use me.  That’s a really, really hard prayer for me given how much I want the job and my prayer history.
  3. Patience. The last P is patience.  Another really, really, really hard thing for me.  I’ve been waiting since Monday afternoon to hear something about this job. And for over a week to hear something on the house.  Can I tell you how much I have bugged my family & friends?  I haven’t heard anything, I’m going crazy, I probably didn’t get it…. Blah, blah, blah!  I’m not a person who likes to wait for much of anything.  I’m a doer, an executer, the one who people turn to to get things done. At least that’s what my references told me when I was asking them my strong points. The executer is not fond of waiting for others. The executer takes matters in her own hands and does it herself.  It’s more efficient, it’s faster and typically better. Yeah, patience is a trait that is one of my weakest. My premature kids taught me I’m in control of NOTHING!!  I’m having to go back in time to the NICU with the twins and recall what it felt like to just breathe, pray and wait and to know it would be ok. Just breathe, pray and wait.

What does all of this tell me?  It tells me this…  If I want God to really lead my life, I have to know that He has purpose for my life, pray for His will, and be patient while waiting to receive it.  It may not be this house and it may not be this job. And if that is the case, then what He has planned will be better than either one of these.  Just keep the faith & remember to breathe.


2 thoughts on “Living on a Prayer..

  1. Pingback: Facing Disappointments «

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